Once upon a time, in a settlement far, far away (Constantine, Michigan to be exact), a young woman asked her wonderful husband to help her highlight her hair.
Being the ever considerate husband, he agreed to help her.
The solution was prepared. The “holey” cap was placed over her head. The hubby had the “crochet hook” in hand and proceeded to pull hairs through the little, tiny holes in the cap. As he was administering this pain to her head, he was being a total gossip; talking about all the latest in fashion, what to do about cuticle issues and rough hands (am I soaking my hands in dish soap, Madge?? Anyone remember THAT commercial??)…just being a normal, male, hairdresser.
After her torture was over, they realized that there was still quite a bit of solution in the bowl. What to do???
The hubby, who had almost a head full of hair at that time, said “Hey, you could highlight MY hair”. The hubby had reddish brown hair and the highlights would look good in his almost a full head of hair.
So the wife put the torture cap on his head and proceeded to pull his hair through the holes.
Time passed quickly and before they knew it, it was WAY past time for the solution to be rinsed from his tresses. And it was then that they realized that she had pulled hair through about every hole in that cap! (In all honesty, she HAD realized it when she did it but thought it would look good).
After his rinse, they were both shocked!!! The first words out of his mouth were “I look like a damn BITCHIN' beach bum! I can’t go to a new job tomorrow looking like this! It looks like someone threw pancake batter at my head!” Even though the new job was in maintenance, it was with a prestigious firm and hats were not allowed (so he couldn’t cover it up!) unless you were working outside.
There was a LOT more spittin’ and sputterin’, cussin’ and swearin’ before he arrived at a solution to the problem… he would shear his head! He shaved all his curly hair off, and basically had an Army cut. Yep, that undeniably got rid of the long, blond/red curly hair, but what is with all these polka dots on what is left of your hair??!! POLKA DOTS! I KID YOU NOT!! LOTS, AND LOTS OF POLKA DOTS…BLOND POLKA DOTS!
You’ve probably figured out by now this couple was none other than Dan and me. I am SO lucky that Dan is good natured because if I’d have been him, I would have killed me!
He started his job with his new look and nothing was said, at least not to his face. It took quite a while for his hair to grow out enough to get rid of his polka dots. Neither one of us has ever asked, offered or mentioned any highlighting since that event.
3 weeks ago